READER QUESTION: SHOULD I WEAR LOLITA FASHION? DEALING WITH TEASING, NO MONEY FOR BRAND CLOTHES, PARENTS DISAPPROVING OF GOTHLOLI.
Dear La Carmina,
I would like some advice on something. My question is whether or not to go Lolita. You see, I would really love to go into the fashion, but I’m sorta scared (although it does help a little bit to be able to read some of the Japanese sites). Partially because I’m afraid my parents wouldn’t approve and if it happens, teasing. Not only that, but I’m only 13 (which makes me have no income and no possibility to get a job) and I live on the East Coast (where there is not much influence from japan). I really appreciate any advice you have on the matter (and, THANK YOU for having such an awesome blog).
– Signed, A troubled Reader
Dear reader,
Please don’t be troubled! Lolita isn’t scary, and wearing the fashion doesn’t have to be like jumping off a bridge. As with any journey, the best way to go forth is by taking baby steps and enjoying every moment of the ride.
I personally don’t think that “entering into Lolita” is an all-or-nothing leap. There’s no rulebook that states you must own certain items or wear expensive Japanese brands to enter this lovely world. Instead, you can make Lolita a part of your life in many small ways. And the further you explore this wonderland, the more your confidence will grow.
No pocket money? No access to Tokyo Lolita brands like Victorian Maiden? None of these should stop you from celebrating Lolita in your own personal way. Take, for example, Gothloli of the Week Anastasiya who is from Russia. She says, “I try to do my best with what I’ve got. Like making my bedroom as cute as possible.” You can do the same: put Mana-sama photos on your wall (like I did), kawaii toys on your bed, hand-made candy and crucifix necklaces on the wall.
Or you can also make tiny “tips of the hat” to Lolita fashion in your daily wear. For example, you might wear a big bow in your hair, or doll eyelashes, or a cute dress similar to the ones in the Milk catalogue above. My friends and I like to mix Lolita influences into our clothes; we don’t believe you have to look like an Angelic Pretty model in order to genuinely enjoy the fashion.
What about teasing and family disapproval? I’m not going to lie to you — even in the most open-minded cities, you’ll encounter stares and harsh words when you wear alternative fashion. But my friends and I keep strong because we must! Holding back this means of self-expression would crush us; it would reduce us to shells of ourselves. And you’ll discover a type of magic in having a “crew of spooks”, loving alternative fashion/lifestyles and celebrating it together. It’s something that someone in a Polo shirt would never experience.
But all that will come later. Remember, trying Lolita fashion shouldn’t feel like a fall down a hill, but a stroll through a rose garden. You can make Loli a part of your life in many subtle ways. So take your time, feel it out and let it slowly enrich your life. Good luck!
Everyone, what would you advise to this reader? How do you make Lolita fashion a part of your life?
If you have a question for La Carmina, email me (gothiccarmina {at} gmail) and I’ll answer it in a blog post. You can read my previous responses to Reader Questions here. (All the above images are flyers I picked up in Tokyo and Osaka.)
Japanese Word of the Day: Kinjo = Neighborhood
Song of the Day: Kaizers Orchestra – Maestro (Gasmasks!)
SHARE & COMMENT
LA CARMINA TV REEL: CNN INTERVIEW SEGMENT WITH DESIGNER KENZO-A, ANDREW ZIMMERN QUOTES, BIZARRE FOODS TOKYO ON TRAVEL CHANNEL DISCOVERY.
I’ve been a busy bee! “The wheels are in motion,” as Seinfeld would say. Why don’t we catch up on press and talk about the controversy over novelty “circle contact lenses”? Let’s do it!
I can’t say enough nice words about Andrew Zimmern, host of the Bizarre Foods TV show on Travel Channel / Discovery. You may recall that I was his guide to weird theme restaurants in the Tokyo episode. I was amazed to see that in his Chow and Again blog for Mpls St. Paul Magazine, Andrew Zimmern gives me a shout-out: “My friend Carmina (her friends get to drop the La when addressing her royal hipsterness) pimps us out on her blog and if you don’t subscribe to this woman’s Facebook, blog, and Twitter feeds you are really missing out, kids.”
And then he takes the niceness even further in his Travel Channel blog! Andrew discusses the Tokyo episode and says it’s too bad the show changed its focus from strange subcultures — “exotic alternative lifestyles like La Carmina and her posse” — back to bizarre foods. As a result, the episode had to be re-tooled a lot of our footage was cut.
Andrew Zimmern laments: “I wish you could have seen the original program in all its glory. For example, the theme restaurant act was not originally about the restaurants, it was about the people that I dined with. Cross dressing, fetish party going, club crazy, hipster chic and phenomenally great company, La Carmina and her friends adore Tokyo because it’s the world’s trend setting capital, a city where you can be whatever you want.”
Speaking of eccentric fashion and theme restaurants… I did an interview with Hong Kong food website Asian Palate. I talk about how I became a foodie, and the oddest Tokyo theme restaurants such as “bonsai-shaped cake delivered by ninjas.” You can read the full interview here and after the jump. (And there’s more about my Theme Restaurants book on this page.)
I uploaded a recent TV segment on YouTube: “La Carmina interviews Rituals Gothic designer Kenzo-A about the evolution of Harajuku fashion for CNN. They shop along Takeshita Doori and visit Takuya Angel’s store to try on clothes. This segment appeared on the Tokyo episode of CNNGo TV and aired on CNN International.”
If you like the episode and want to see more, please subscribe to my YouTube channel — many more on the way. You can see photos and the entire CNN TV show in this post.
Now for some controversy… or not. Are novelty “circle” contact lenses from Japan — which give the appearance of big cute eyes — dangerous to consumers? The FDA has not approved them because of concerns that the lenses could harm the eyes.
Some of you on Twitter said it’s nothing but media hype. Others shared stories of eye damage from colored lenses. And the rest of you suggest common caution: as with normal contacts, don’t wear them for long and care for them properly.
What’s your opinion on “circle” wide eyed contact lenses like Geo? Have you tried them? I personally have never worn novelty lenses because my eyesight is horrid and I must be very careful with my eyes…
Japanese Word of the Day: Kanzen = Perfection
Song of the Day: GO!GO!7188 – Kinkyori Renai (The band that performs the song in our CNN segment.)
LA CARMINA
