Category Archive for How-Tos
OLD DRESS BECOMES A CUT-OUT SHIRT: SPIDER WEB CORSET TOP WITH TUXEDO TAILS.
Ronan requested The Committee’s assistance in finding him a new jacket, and so we browsed the Urban Outfitters website together. I grew bored with his indecision and began clicking on the women’s apparel links. I rarely visit Urban – I try to avoid wearing anything you might see on another human being – but this t-shirt with a laser cutout of a spider web ($30) caught my attention. I prodded Ronan: “Buy it for meee!” He immediately logged off.
If you can’t convince boys to buy you clothes, you’ll simply have to deconstruct them yourself. I dragged out an old Lithium dress from 2005; it was a rejected clothing sample, and for good reason – I was never able to make it work (top right). Time for some scissors action.
I turned the dress inside-out, traced a cobweb on the back, and carefully cut it out. I decided to wear the dress reverse-forward, which transforms it into a corset…
…with trailing Gothic Aristocrat tuxedo tails! I wore the spider corset over a white, long-sleeve Banana Republic top, a Betsey Johnson lace-and-bows skirt…
…and a ridiculous Gothic Rococo meets Kentucky Derby hat. (You may recognize this monstrosity from my Vancouver Sun newspaper interview.) I picked up the huge-brimmed hat in NYC’s Garment District (around $25), and clipped on a silver fabric flower and gauzy grey fabric for a veil. It sits on the world’s spookiest hatstand – a mannequin head that I decorated to look like (no joke) DJ Chihiro of Tokyo Dark Castle. The decapitated DJ serves a dual function… I’ll spill the beans in a later post.
So, Ronan, I can make my own spider top, thank you very much. Now if only I could turn stale leftovers into sashimi…
SHARE & COMMENT
REVERSE FRENCH MANICURE: GOTH NAILS WITH BLACK RED NAILPOLISH, WHITE TIPS.
Count D, my late cheeseball taste tester, bestowed upon me a $40 spa gift card that he found while cleaning his bedroom. (Yes, I have an odd life.) Now, I’m not a spa type; Goth aesthetics and spa esthetics don’t exactly mesh. In all my years, I’ve never gotten my nails done – unless you count a few neon paintjobs from LA’s Beauty Bar and NYC’s now-defunct Spirit. In fact, I’d almost rather have my fingernails ripped off than mince around with a dainty French manicure.
But massages and facials were out of the question, since I hate when random people touch me. (Yes, I’m an odd person.) So I thought – why not use this opportunity to get some crazy nail art, like the Vampire of Rose photos I posted?
I left an enthusiastic voice message. The woman who returned my call chose her words carefully: “I’m sorry, but I must regretfully inform you that after having a conference with our resident artist, we’ve decided that our team will not be offering services in the direction of nail art…” (Seriously, she spoke as if Basil Farrow had been run over by a car.) Then her voice lifted: “How about a French manicure?” I held back my nausea and croaked out a “yes”.
But it was going to be on my terms. On the day of the appointment, I handed my baffled esthetician the above drawing. “But… we don’t have black nail polish, only shades of pink!” “Not to worry,” I said and pulled out three bottles from my coffin purse.
Following my instructions, she alternated red and black, with white tips and moons. I’m quite pleased with my reverse French manicure. They complement my blackened teeth (it’s MAC Fluidline eye liner), leather choker (made from an old guitar strap), mourning veil, and corset… just a typical day at the office.
I can’t claim to be Christopher Columbus on this one. Have you ever come up with a seemingly original idea, only to Google it and discover that a dozen people have done it already? At least I’m in good company: Christian Dior, Tracy Reese, and Japanese yamambas (left, center, right).
Twas a nice experience – but $60 for a reverse French manicure? Methinks I’ll be sticking to my usual self-inflicted, badly-peeling black polish.
LA CARMINA
